Ring doorbell v the cat poo bandit 🐈‍⬛💩 the true story of tracking the HUMAN culprit!

The cat poo bandit caught on Ring camera
(Image credit: Ariane Sherine)

One night last May, I went to dump a bin bag in the outside bin and got a nasty surprise: the bin was full of cat poo and stunk to high heaven! I don’t own a cat, but there are plenty living in my street. They slink through my back garden so often, I’ve given them names: ‘James Bond Cat’ is fluffy, white and malevolent-looking; ‘Michael Jackson Cat’ has white socks.

However, I may not own a cat, but I do own a trusty Ring Doorbell camera, and I pay an £80 ($100) subscription fee each year for the footage. (Ring's subscription plans have just been updated, but Ring cameras are also extra cheap this time of year!)

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Ariane Sherine
Author and journalist

Ariane Sherine is an author and journalist on many subjects including interiors, and singer-songwriter (under the artist name Ariane X). She has written for the Guardian, Times, Independent, Telegraph, Spectator, Mail, New Statesman, Esquire, NME, Sun and Metro. She regularly appears on television and radio.

She's also written comedy for the BBC and Channel 4, and is still known worldwide for the 2008 Atheist Bus Campaign, featuring adverts on buses which proclaimed 'There's probably no God. Now stop worrying and enjoy your life' sponsored by Richard Dawkins.

As a result, Ariane went on to edit and compile the bestselling celebrity charity anthology The Atheist's Guide to Christmas (HarperCollins). She has also written three self-help books for major publisher Hachette: Talk Yourself Better, How to Live to 100 and The How of Happy (the last two co-written with public health consultant David Conrad). Ariane's debut novel Shitcom was published in 2021, and is a hilarious body swap comedy. Her latest book is the biography The Real Sinéad O'Connor by White Owl Books.