My daughter's big day taught me this important lesson about wedding photography

My daughter recently got married. During the celebration, I was so impressed with how the wedding photographer interacted with the happy couple, the wedding party, the parents of the bride (which included me) and groom, and everyone else. And I believe her rapport helped produce truly fantastic images. 

Of course, it’s not to say that technical portrait photography skill isn’t important, too. In fact, my daughter and her fiancé were obviously looking for a very capable photographer to hire. But she was also looking for a particular style of photography that meant the photographer wasn’t just giving orders on how to pose for group portraits. My daughter said, “I was looking for a style that was less posed and more candid, but with an artful quality to it too, somewhere between portrait photographer and documentary photographer. I wanted my photographer to capture the feeling of the guests and events in addition to the ceremony and portraits of us and the bridal party.” 

So, by choosing this slightly hybrid style of wedding photographer, which has become very popular these days with young couples getting married, meant that how she interacted was as important as what she photographed and how she posed her subjects. 

One of the essential qualities this photographer had was that she was able to interact very nicely and respectfully with everyone, but also with humor, and that she made all the subjects feel at ease. It’s something my daughter was very impressed with. “One of the things we loved about our photographer,” my daughter says, “is that she was very calm, very casual, but very fun to work with; she engaged the group as well as individuals, joking with us, pausing to adjust someone’s positioning, resuming joking around, and snapping the perfect picture while everyone is still laughing.” And that easy-going quality resulted in images depicting the wedding party and all the guests having a great time!

It's a quality that definitely meant a lot to the bride and groom, particularly since they were often the main subjects. “There’s a lot of anxiety on a wedding day,” my daughter said, “and her calm manner made it easy for us to feel comfortable. I think part of that is confidence: She’s an experienced photographer. But her not stressing the little things helped us stay cool, too. We also had quite a large wedding party (8 bridesmaids, 7 groomsmen, plus parents, grandparents, and siblings) so corralling all of us was quite the task. But she managed everyone really well, capturing small group moments in the shuffle between larger group shots.”

It was obvious to my daughter that her easy-going manner didn’t mean she wasn’t serious about the business of taking photos. But her behavior really helped make it a great experience: Her relaxed manner really had a very positive impact on everyone else. “I really appreciated that while, of course, she took the business of taking our pictures seriously, she was still having fun with it, demonstrating how she wanted groomsmen to pose or walk (‘like you’re cool guys, you know?’), or dancing through the crowd on the dance floor to get great party shots. It’s obvious she’s really enthusiastic about her work, and it shows through in all the pictures she took of our big day.” 

My daughter’s wedding planner noticed her friendly manner, as well, pointing out that she was impressed by how she was quite skilled at being very inconspicuous, even during the important events that day, like the first dance or the wedding toasts. “Some photographers think they’re the stars of the show,” my daughter’s wedding planned noted.

In the end, the photographer’s combination of easy-going rapport and her skill as an event photographer resulted in lots of fantastic photos of the wedding. “I think she was really able to capture the lively, busy, and slightly dreamlike feeling of our wedding,” my daughter said.

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